In a world where human beings are drifting further and further away from one other and AI is stepping in to increasingly isolate us—custom hand-built works of art are only going to be more valuable.
So, I did something so dumb the other day. Well, what I did wasn’t so much dumb as was the result of what I did.
I’ll admit, I use AI in my day job. But not to create content or supplant the human touch, but to handle administrative tasks, data entry and other things that frankly machines should be doing for us.
But while I was in our AI client, I saw they’d announced a new feature. It was called the “AI Song Generator.” Curious like a child, I clicked into it and entered a simple one-sentence prompt: make me a song about riding a Klunker in the style of 1970s rock.
And in about 25 seconds, this is the absolute turd-burger it shat out:
I mean that’s bad, right?
Like hilariously you-probably-spat-out-your-coffee-bad. If you ever worried that AI was about the supplant artists for good, let this put your mind at ease. Wow.
As Ben Affleck said in a recent interview, AI generated content is designed to head to the middle. It craves the median; the obvious; the uninspiring. The broadest possible interpretation of “art.”
Now, technological credit where credit is due, the above AI figured out what a Klunker is and how and where they’re ridden and created a song about it in a snap. The mention of the flannel jacket was a detailed touch.
But it’s still a godawful song. Billions of dollars of innovation, for that.
But this brings me to the point of this post. Why we build these bikes, and why they’re only becoming more popular.
We crave something made by a human hand that you can shake in admiration or appreciation; we crave human ideas and unique takes on existing projects and problems.
Not the median—the apex.
It’s why companies like Landyachtz Bikes are doing what they do—not necessarily Klunkers, but handmade custom bikes that cannot be replicated by drop-shipped overseas brands. Or, when it comes time, AI.
And it’s why, on Facebook forums or what have you, I just stop and stare for a minute at a beauty Klunker… admiring every detail and wondering how the builder came up with the colour scheme, why they decided to bring in the details the did, right down to the accents on the headset and choice of grips… you’ve probably seen a build like I’m talking about.
The above are just some examples. For others, just search “Reader’s Rides” on this site. And if you have one, send it to me via this page.
This is why these bikes attract us. They’re a usable, movable, workable, physical expression of human creativity. But not just to be hung on a wall—actually ridden as transport and recreation.
They’re at once a throwback and as modern as AI itself. And they matter. Made of steel and heart, they matter.
I want to create an archive of these beauties that doesn’t belong to a Tech Overlord in a forum that can’t be erased on a whim because Zuck changed his mind about something. (Hell, I’ve at least pre-paid this hosted site until 2028!)
That’s why that stupid song made me laugh, and also bummed me out a bit. Please, let’s not make this the future, OK? (And I know I probably shouldn’t have made it… but alas…)
Keep building bikes, by hand. Keep making mistakes. Keep learning. Keep Klunking!
It’s us versus the machines, folks. And we ride at dawn!
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Wonderful article – I just love this. Santa brought my son a scooter (with spoked rims) – we were recently cruising around the neighborhood and a guy mentioned how rad his scooter was and how my bike (klunker) wasn’t just something you picked up at Kmart.
( The World Of Custom ). At the age of six in the very early 60’s I’ll say 1963 thing’s were really starting to boom with personalization of your ride whether it was a car motorcycle bicycle or boat. All the young teenagers of driving age were tricking out their cars putting on chrome revers wheels and installing CherryBomb Glass Pack mufflers to enhance and bring out that tiger tune 🎶 of a angry V8 engine and cruising the strip and gathering at the local hamburger stand with the class mates. The mag wheel was near to hit the market around maybe late 1964 . A polished outside rim with a dull like cast center section of five spokes . A big deal. Hot Rod Magazine was getting to become the thing featuring Hot custom cars and sometimes boats at that time. I remember often a pack of Hell’s Angels would speed by the car’s on the U.S. 101 on their Harley’s with tricked out House of Color big I’m talking big metal flake paint work and air brushing enhancements on their fuel tanks loud chrome trumpet exhaust and chromed out springer front forks. As a kid watching them pass by was impressive with the sound of thunder that went along with it. It was like attending a custom motorcycle show as they past and I was sad as they faded away as the show soon vanished. My thoughts were I want my ride to be like theirs and soon enough the Schwinn Sting Ray was born in many different flavors. Banana Seats Ape Hanger Handle Bars Chrome Springer Front Ends Sissy bar could be added to enhance that big metal flake banana seat and a rear Drag Slick tire to top your ride off. Drag racing was becoming big so Schwinn again came out with a Sting Ray Model that resembled a Dragster called the Rail a type of Drag Car. The New Model Schwinn was called the Orange Crate . A bike that had the look of something for Drag Racing to make a kid feel like they have ride as cool as the stuff you’d see rolling down the street. In California this stuff was everywhere at that time and soon the Slotted Mag wheel was born and the Muscle Car soon was born. The 1965 GT 350 Fast Back Mustang lit the whole thing on fire and rolled out of the Ford Show Room with Glass pack Mufflers ready to race but street legal . This world of Custom by 1967 was about to Explode and was so big that Mattel Toy Corporation came up with the Hot Wheel so us kids could own stuff like dad. My Dad liked all this stuff so I grew up with it. America was on fire the coolest cars and for kids the best toys ever made. I think to are brothers and sisters in Canada 🇨🇦 I don’t think it was much different there either a life of expression and freedom and a custom set of wheels for the young and the grown. ( So Not To Forget The Young Man In SO CAL that was the gasoline ⛽️ on the Fire .). His name was (Ed Roth ) The Creator Of The Cartoon Image Called (RAT FINK) Ed had a vision and a imagination and liked drawing and did poorly in school as it board him to death . He also thought Mickey Mouse was for whoops and hated the character. So he wanted to draw up a bad ass counter character to wimpy Mickey and drew up a bad ass looking scary rat image called Rat Fink . In his mind he just overhauled Mickey Mouse . A Custom Mickey Mouse you might say. His class mates thought the image was cool that drawing made him famous and he went on to build many famous and wild custom show cars and really was the father of Customization to any thing on wheels that also includes bicycles also. Air brush painting and a pin striped a lot of his work. His visions took off in the sixties. Some how though the young May of never heard of Ed Roth or the custom vision of what Mickey Mouse should of been the world of custom or the custom parts that you see on the shelf or on the Web for your bike or car may not exist today if it wasn’t for Big Daddy Rat / Ed Roth. If you like that different type of direction then you might have a little Rat Fink in your DNA. Look up the image of Rat Fink recommended. Is the Fink Cooler than Mickey ?
Last Summer I kept looking at my wife’s Electra girls cruiser 1# as I passed by it. The bike had this killer yellow paint job that had gold pearl flake in it that made this ride kind of pop in the sun. The rest of the parts and trim were either chrome or aluminum and the head tube angle kind of at an odd stance a bit raked out . It might just be me but Girls bike just aren’t cool . Sorry ladies. Well that’s ok because I decided to make this one cool and throw on a polished two speed hub complemented with some Maxxis Hookworm tires and with the yellow on black lettering on the tires matched up with that cool yellow paint job this blank palette was becoming alive . I then removed the chain guard and without disturbing the factory paint with a electrician tool one third moving forward from the rear put a pattern of 3/4” holes on the chain guard that amounted to five and pin stripe the edges with white paint to match the Electra logo up ahead on the pice and reinstalled it. I also installed in raw finish a very compact high end Super Cycle Bell 🔔 on the chrome handle bars. I left the black hand grips and seat alone and with the yellow Maxxis letters on the black tires the bike has with the yellow paint job Bumblebee 🐝 look to it was born. With that slightly raked out stance this Girls bike was braking all the rules and entering planet 😎cool. So I took a few steps back and said what’s left to do. Awh yes slightly reconfigure the jiffy stand so when parked it has that raked out Parked Harley Davison look in front of a local watering hole. The Gangster look 👀😎. Then the Icing on the cake I installed a couple of Rat Fink Graphics. After all wasn’t the vision inspired by the late Ed Roth. I think so. It is one cool girls bike now ? Hell I sneak it out and ride it now and it’s a dam cool addition to the poor mans Jay Leno’s Garage.